Doctor Captain's Log
National Cleavage Day renamed, James Cameron sinks to new lows, Tulisa’s sextape is disappointing and Jon Hamm saves the day.
One of my jobs is pitching shows. Most of them don’t get picked up. Soon you will understand why.
This week’s pitch:
Lars Ulrich Leaves
Outline:
In this weekly 22-part series, the founder of Metallica talks us though his collection of leaves and pressed flowers, and shows us in real-time how he accomplishes his fairly dreadful results. All whilst singing Metallica songs.
This week, a video I shot for Senegalese artist Seyni Diop, who wrote a track about the controversial elections in Senegal…
This week: Hunger Games feeds Hollywood bank accounts, and Dina Lohan wants you to call her
One of my jobs is pitching shows. Most of them don’t get picked up. Soon you will understand why.
This week’s pitch:
Detective Pimp
Outline:
In a world of lawlessness, and also lawfulness, but mostly lawlessness, one man stands on the line between hero and villain.
That man is…. Detective Pimp. He won’t let any ho’ stand in the way of catching his man, and will slap any bitch down if they get all up in his face…
German celebrity rabbit murdered, Kirsten Dunst has her ups and downs,
and Katie Price is… Mother Of The Year…?
Outline:
Each week, our host Agamemnon Spartacus interviews one man and one woman, both of whom have not had sex with you. Over the course of an hour, they sit in a cold, dark room while they list your flaws and faults, and explain in excrituating detail why they have not – and will not – have sex with you. Ever.
Well whadyaknow! It’s the critically acclaimed video I directed for Arrows Of Love’s single ‘Real Friends’.
Dykes get married, Limbaugh chugs a big cock of lies, and Olivia Wilde saves the day.
